Kickstarters

This is a tiny blog, although perhaps not so much as I’d been assuming. You’ve all probably heard of these D&D related kickstarter projects, so consider this a nagging reminder. There are probably others that are worth your attention that I haven’t mentioned, so please feel free to post those in the comments.

The Adventurer Conquerer King Player’s Companion kickstarter ends tonight at 10PM EST. I’ve skimmed the pdf that was released late last year and will be playing it for the first time tomorrow going through Dwimmermount with Tavis.

I made my first delve into Dwimmermount last night with Paul Hughes, who writes blog of holding and has a kickstarter for his Random Dungeon Generator as Map.  This is one of those things I’m not entirely sure I need but backed solely on the fun I had last night at his gaming table (which was in the middle of a crowded art gallery).

Dwimmermount has its own kickstarter, of course, and I’ve signed on for that one. I hesitate to look at the extras and notes too much since I’ll be gaming in it a few more times I expect. What can I say? I’m a sucker for a good megadungeon (insert StoneHell nag here).

Lastly, is the indie-a-go-go campaign for The Monolith from Beyond Space and Time plus The God That Crawls. This one is not pacing well toward its goal, while the Kickstarter ones are. I don’t know if its the site or the way the perk levels are constructed, but I can’t imagine there being a lack of enthusiasm for LotFP material, especially adventure modules by Raggi Himself. Instead of positioning the campaign as the only way these will see the light of day, he presents the campaign as a way to help LotFP publish projects faster, so perhaps some portion of the OSR gang know he’ll publish this no matter what and are willing to wait. Now that he’s got McKinney’ stuff out the door, I am anxious to get him back to publishing his own work so I kicked in some sheckels.

 

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Top 20 Bard Songs

In order to close out the 2011 ‘Bring It’ series of by-request posts, I’m going to skip around the last ones. Some of your requests require more time than others, but now that I have time to post again, I need to build up steam again.

Jukebox hero: Twelve or more songs the bards are singing this season in a tavern near you in Vornheim (or any fantasy setting).

 

  1. The King of Fools
  2. The Nun and the Centaur
  3. My Medusa’s Love
  4. A Boar in the Bed
  5. The Gnome’s Delight
  6. A Penny for a Squire
  7. Just an Old Fashioned Witch Burning
  8. The Frisky Friar
  9. The Lady and the Bear
  10. A Wolf in the Garden
  11. A Feather Between Us
  12. Escape from the Undercity
  13. A Slaver at Heart
  14. Snipe Wedding Soup
  15. Legs Go a Looking
  16. Lovely Linda Gingerlocks
  17. My Lady the Werewolf
  18. A Hobbit Sees All
  19. When Two Moons Meet
  20. Ballad of the Flame Princess

 

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Blank Hex Drop Table Grid

For you to enjoy. Examples of it in action are here, here and here. Please feel free to share what you do with the rest of the class in the comments below.

rolangs_drop_table_hex_grid (33K PDF)

Also: James Raggi at LotFP has put up his Indie-a-go-go page for The Monolith from beyond Space and Time and The God that Crawls. I for one would like to see this be a success. I love his original adventures and it feels like it’s been forever since the last one, so go on over there and sponsor what you can afford.

 

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Dice Drop Table: Evil Temple of Evilness

Another dice drop table, the Evil Temple of Evilness and the Great God Orsobuffo (named for the guy whose request lead to these tables). If you haven’t followed by two previous posts (here and here), this is how they work:

You print these out and lay them flat on a table. Drop some dice on the paper and interpret the results. If you already have a map, this will help you populate it. If you don’t then you can let the results guide you.

Each die should land on one or more outer or inner hexes. The inner hexes have encounters in them. If a die lands partly on one, then the encounter and its surrounding items are present in the room. If a die lands on only the outer hex, then it probably is touching more than one. I tried to design this so that the trappings in adjacent large hexes are somewhat compatible, so see if you can put whatever the die touches in the room. I’d also suggest that whatever large hex the die covers more, put the encounter in that hex in the room as well.

Unlike straight-on tables, this allows for some interpretation and that is the key–do what makes a better scenario.

Here’s an example of a temple made from this table:

 

Dice dropped on the temple table

I have some acolytes, a mummy, an anti-paladin, the temple guards and a private sacrificial alter. I also have two dice on the head priest. I’ll take this to mean there are two priests/priestesses somehow.

The Secret Temple of Orsobuffo

Crypt: The previous high priests and saints of the past are buried here. There are several dusty crypts here and a list carved in stone details the occupants. It does not mention that one of the occupants is a mummy. Also on the wall is a mural of an unholy prophecy of the return of Orsobuffo. There is a giant nest of centipedes in place of a corpse inside one crypt. There is also a scroll of binding there, which details a ritual for enslaving a creature from an outer plane.

Acolytes Quarters: Here can be found the beds, trunks, books, correspondence and prayer books of the acolytes, who can be found throughout the temple (say there are 12, total). A careful search of the trunks will also reveal the accounting books used to manage the temple and a map of the outer and inner planes, including access points. One of the acolytes is a doppelganger. You might involve it somehow in the high priest succession mentioned below.

Sleeping Quarters of the Anti-Paladin: A bedroom, and privy. Here the party can find a whenstone, unholy books (yes, again with all the unholy this and anti-that), dishes on a table with the remnants of a fine meal and a whetstone. The anti-paladin is not present.

Temple Guard Quarters: Here you will find the living quarters of the guards, including bunks, belongings, sports equipment, dice and weapons of the guards. On the tables are the remains of an ordinary meal. There is some gold in the foot lockers. The guards are on duty or otherwise not present.

There are two dice on the ‘high priest’ hex. There would not normally be two ‘high priest’ quarters unless you wanted to have this religion require two for ceremonial purposes. I will go that way and say that this cult only has twin priests. A high priest is chosen by the Orsobuffo idol from the two twin priests. The chosen then sacrifices the other on the altar. If you are a big fan of coincidence in your adventure, the party’s entry to the temple is on the night of choosing.

High Priests Quarters: This suite has been temporarily set up into two sets of living quarters. In one quarters are the thangka collection and the flute. In the other, adjoining chamber, is a private shrine and the cat (a disquised and undiscovered efreet). Both quarters have access to the vestments closet and the privy. The high priests are a rotund pair, a twin brother and sister. Both are secretly hoping to find a way to manipulate the idol into choosing them.

In the main hall is the giant statue of Orsobuffo. He appears as a fat, horned devil with jewels for eyes. This statue will animate when the prophecy on the wall is chanted a thousand times and raise either the right or left arm to indicate which of the twin priests he wants sacrificed on the altar, which is at his feet. There are many drums and gongs that are played as the chanting commences.

PC’s might mistake this as choosing the one who lives. Use that. Also in this main hall the night of choosing will be the antipaladin, the acolytes, and most of the temple guard.

There is an on-off switch that animates the statue fully, allowing it to walk. It is surrounded by a poison dart trap, which is activated by all but a few floor tiles. The priests know the way, as does the antipaladin.  Also here is a self-destruct mechanism for the temple, which is also set off if the statue is destroyed (not deactivated). There is a secret door here as well, which leads outside.

(Note to Orsobuffo: I named this after you, but didn’t put it in the title so as to not interfere with SEO to your blog. Not that this blog is big enough to do that…)

Evil Temple Jpeg

The Evil Temple of Evilness JPEG (2.3 MB)

 

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Dice Drop Table: Kaotic Cave

It’s not often I get to show off how artistically my development is arrested, but here we go…

A multi column dungeon dressings/rooms/accessories table, with columns like ‘natural cave’, ‘necromancy lab’, ‘mine’, ‘underground prisons’, ‘evil temple’ and whatever you feel like including. Oh why am I the 15th!??!

I’m afraid I can’t do this in the format that you requested. Well I could, but I’m not going to. I  understand the OSR fetish for endless tables, tables, tables, but in this case, I wanted to do something different that will hopefully still be useful for you.

Today’s post is the first in a series of drop tables, the Kaotic Cave (2.4 MB file). This is the ‘natural cave’ table. These tables are all hand-crafted with no real artistic skill whatsoever and are not intended to reflect high production values. To wit:

Level 1 of Kaotic Cave

These are the dice dropped on the chart for level 1 of Kaotic Cave

Just grab a handful of dice and drop them on the table to fill several rooms and with trappings and possibly encounters or encounter hooks. Look under each die at every space it touches and arrange the items indicated on your map however you like. Each large hex has a smaller hex in the middle with an encounter. If the inner hex is not touched, have the monsters be away from their lair when the PC’s arrive. Maybe they are wandering, or perhaps they are in a battle with a neighbor. If multiple large hexes are touched, you can optionally include all the encounters together in a large room or hallway, battling it out.

I have tried to arrange these tables so that encounters that have similar window dressing are close to one another. The Kaotic Cave has several humanoid races close to one another with accessories that fit any group.

Example d4 on Kaotic Caves

Smashed shriekers, mound of skulls, troglodyte corpse and garden

For example, the mound of skulls in the troglodyte hex could easily belong to the Kobalds. If I dropped a d4 on that space, as pictured, I would fill a cave chamber with smashed shriekers, a mound of skulls, a troglodyte corpse, a garden and some trogs fighting the kobalds in their home. Why in the Kobald’s home? If I didn’t have a preference, I’d just go where the larger part of the die is. If two dice cover the same large hex, I reroll the one furthest from the center.

I threw several dice with this, so for level one, I have:

  1. a pack of kobalds [sic] defending their home from troglodytes. They were warned by the dying alarm of their shriekers, which were placed to guard their garden (of mushrooms, I suppose) and the shrine built with the skulls of their ancestors.
  2. a room with troll bones,
  3. an ale cellar with a secret door to the outside,
  4. a corpse in the middle of a pentagram (no obvious explanation, perhaps a hook to later encounters),
  5. an owl bear’s nest with owlbear(s) and all the surrounding trappings (worms, bones, beetles, roaches, centipedes and a half-eaten dwarf),
  6. the mushroom mens’ home with its residents plus all the surrounding trappings (dung, glowing fungus, mulch pile, spore pods, guano and a mushroom garden)
  7. a room with rats eating a dead adventuring party.

Another throw for level two gives me:

  1. a room with a brazier and burnt bones,
  2. the lair of the giant spider, where she is hiding, plus all the surrounding trappings (eggs, more bones, small spiders, a giant web, mummified corpses and a secret exit),
  3. a room full of bats
  4. a hallway with a full backpack and shredded ropes and a trap
  5. a nest of flail snails with the snail family plus slime trails, trippy mushrooms, a dead party, a pile of bones, a pond and a bunch of baby flail snails.
  6. a dead, runt adult albino ape, lying on a dung pile, holding a cow femur
  7. a hidden room with weapons, armor and several jewels belonging to human bandits, who are away.
Level 3:
  1. the d4 went off the sheet, so I’ll add one wandering/pursuing monster to this level: It’s a minotaur who wants the dragon’s treasure but will let someone else kill it.
  2. The lair of the trogs, who have their own skull mound, human bones, a cave painting of demons, trippy berries, their own smashed shriekers and a half eaten kobald [still sic]. These would be the weak, young and elderly trogs, since the boys are out fighting. I wonder who started this?
  3. another chamber of bats and guano–the same large chamber as on level 2.
  4. A pool or stream with a secret underwater door, which leads to a lake outside.
  5. an abandoned campsite (formerly belonging to goblins).
  6. A gelatinous cube lurks in this chamber. A smart party will be wary once they find human bones, a map (of what? you decide!), a scroll of spells, a ring, gold coins and some bits of armor.
  7. The dragon’s chamber, complete with dragon, hoard, ceiling exit, eggs, melted armor slag, pieces of armor and a flock of birds that clean parasites from under its scales as it sleeps.

Now this won’t populate your megadungeon, but I think the above isn’t too shabby for a night of adventuring. The die rolls took twelve seconds total, while the typing took twelve minutes.

Here’s the Kaotic Cave as a hi-res jpeg at 2.4 MB. I’ll probably update the images to make them smaller and more readable later this week.

I hope it was worth the wait, Orsobuffo. Tomorrow: The necromancer’s academy.

Kaotic Cave v1 (2.4 MB)

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Ten Cursed Coins

John Johnson said:

To satisfy my irrational love of the d10 I would love to have 10 unusual, weird, and magical coins.

At the very least, these cannot be disposed of without a remove curse spell.
  1. Dinar of Destruction. This coin transmutes to copper, silver, electrum, gold, platinum, mithril and so forth. It can also change its appearance and apparent age to match any coin ever made. It becomes more precious if the owner is trying to buy something deadly with the intent to cause harm and less valuable if the owner is trying to buy supplies, healing, etc. It appears worthless if given as an act of charity. Merchants will not notice the change consciously.
  2. Dead Mickey’s Doubloon. Anyone who finds this will recognize it as a doubloon, a coin with ‘heads’ and ‘tails’, traditionally used for gambling and making arbitrary decisions. Because it is enchanted/cursed, the first forty times you flip it as a gamble, it will come up as you call it. The next forty it will come up against your true wish, no matter what you call aloud.
  3. Quid of Calling. These coins are bound to a particular animal or monster. There is a 10 percent chance of encountering 1-3 of that creature during the course of the day. Treat these as cursed items for the proposes of getting rid of them.
  4. Kroner of Control. This coin is the monetary equivalent of an intelligent sword, capable of taking over its owner whenever matters of money are involved, whether it is the dividing of spoils or the purchase of supplies. It is very greedy.
  5. Dollar of Detriment. This reduces a random ability score by 5 for two days. Afterward, there is one hour in which it can be given away or slipped into another’s possession. After the hour, it reactivates again, effecting a different randomly chosen ability score.
  6. Mark of the Devil. An infernal coin with occult markings. It catches fire when in water. Anyone possessing this coin for even a minute will bear the mark of The Enemy until the mark is removed via remove curse. Detect evil will reveal them as evil, even if they are lawful good. Unlike the other coins, it is happy to let you pass it around.
  7. Sheckel of Strength. This coin weighs two thousand pounds when held by any but the first in the party to touch it. To this person, it weighs no more than a regular coin. Note: It cannot be used as a weapon because it gains mass as soon as it leaves its owner’s possession. It cannot be used to crush someone, as it rolls over them quickly and to the floor. DMs: In other words, do not let this become a combat advantage unless you want.
  8. Yuan of Youth. The owner of this coin will stop and then reverse the aging of the bearer by ten percent of their current age until they are approximately 10 years old (in human years). Spells and knowledge are not lost, but strength is. Attitudes do revert to those the character had at that age, whatever they may have been. When the spell is broken, age is regained at twice the rate lost.
  9. Guilden of Gum. Will transmute into a very sticky gum when handed from one person to another. This gum will entangle the two together and continue to stretch and expand until all nearby are caught in it. This ball of gummy substance has intelligence and will attempt to immobilize the most dangerous beings nearby. Treat it as a high-level web or entangle spell. These are sometimes hidden in treasure as a deterrent to theft and only work once.
  10. Livre of the Dead. This rare coin will seem a great find of unknown origin and undetermined benefit. It will animate its owner upon death, raising their level by 6. These wight/lich lords will then try to establish a castle, tower or lair and become an enemy of the party.
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Eighteen Common Hireling Motivations

Lasgunpacker said:

Dear Sanity-clause,
Although I have not been good this year, I would like: a 3d6 table of hireling/follower/retainer goals and objectives
(traditional)

Thank you,
lasgunpacker

Since 3d6 is a bell curve, the most common goals and objectives will be in the middle. I tried to keep these traditional. I included some literary and film examples in some cases, although I don’t think they are necessary.


Roll 3d6 Objective
3 Maybe I will find a cure for this curse/disease/malformity.
4 One of the PC’s will be a great leader and I will be his right hand!
5 Restore honor to the family name.
6 Need money to ransom sister/mother/brother/son/father/pet owlbear.
7 Village/home burned to the ground (Luke Skywalker)
8 See the world! Meet interesting people! And take their stuff!
9 Get enough food (or gold) for family to survive winter/rainy season/drought. (Young Genghis Khan)
10 Prove worthy of a bride/groom/honor.
11 Just plain mean. Likes to kill. (The Comedian)
12 Prove that I’m better than Dad/Mom/Uncle Joe. (Jaime Lannister)
13 Former prisoner. No one else wants me. I’ll take what I want. (Jack Sparrow, Riddick)
14 Wants to learn the ropes. (Incrediboy)
15 Just one last score/adventure/war then I can quit. (Danny Glover in Lethal Weapon)
16 Really a peasant/woman/child, but wants to be accepted as a warrior (Kikuchiyo)
17 Works for the party’s enemies.
18 Believes fighting the dark forces/monsters is a religious calling.

 

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Twelve Fantasy Tavern Flies / Galactic Races

This is what we scientists call a “Twofer”:

Twelve (or more) drunken named NPCs found in the local inn or tavern.

Kudos for doing this.

Lex Icon on said

A list of things the big bad corporation is doing to the supernaturals they’ve kidnapped. New World of Darkness spacefaring campaign, so any sort of supernatural you can think of could be included.

Alternatively, just a list of strange aliens to use in said campaign would be great too. Whatever’s easier.

Twelve Fantasy Tavern Flies / Galactic Races
Roll 1d12 Name Scifi Desc. Fantasy Desc.
1 Hoblart Walking Sore Walking Source of Sores
2 Moosasa Dark Multi-eyed merchants Dark Elf Merchant, sees six of everything
3 Argle Upright walking chihuahua-looking bipeds Short, loud, barely walking
4 Mooch Tall, thin, gold-skinned worms Tall, thin, no gold, probably has worms
5 Walp Two senses: Touch and smell Smells and wants to touch you
6 Merple Galactic banking race Always broke, asking for money
7 Zaras Sharp exoskeletal spines Draws a knife at the slightest provocation
8 Poi Inside-out parrot-looking things Has pet bird that talks
9 Lola Sentient liquid, looks like lava lamp Fat, loses temper easily
10 Lyssa Has seven ears, three mouths The town gossip
11 Prap Slave race, used as laborers. Village Idiot. Large.
12 Inid Octopoid. Extremely Clever. Doesn’t drink. Not to be trusted.
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Some Fantasy Prisons

 

Dear Satan Claws,

I’ve been trying to be a good DM. Sorry ’bout that hell mouth thing. For Xmas could I please has a list of things the bad guys are doing with human and/or demihuman prisoners … or why the bad guys built a prison? & who/what the warden is in each case?

What are the bad guys doing to the prisoners?

Making them mine for mithril/gold/saltpeter/magic purple mushrooms. Because dwarves like the carving and the forging, not the digging. Supervisor: Bluebeard of Mangledroit

Testing the effects of purple lotus root. Warden: Mullifer the Alchemist.

Giving them an hour’s head start. Because man is the deadliest game of all. Host: Ranger Pud

Target practice for mages. Manager: Molgo the Banished

Food for manticores, sphinxes, minotaurs, dragons, vampires… Chef: Drexel (a drider)

Forging weapons and armor for the overlord’s army. Smithmeister: Drogo Hammertoe of the Foggy Mountain

The prisoners’ constant prayers for deliverance create enough psychic noise to hide a secret weapon or experiment from the prying eyes of the gods. Holy Representative: Archbishop Sylass

Breeding them with other demihuman and human races in search of the perfect soldier. Mixmistriss: Mellicent Woe

Parts for the flesh golem army. Master Surgeon: Doctor Fronk ibn Steen

Made to learn demonic script and read a specific text aloud in order to determine the correct pronunciation. When a new syllable is correctly pronounced, the prisoner is usually consumed by infernal flames or some other such fate. Warden Moxtras the Equipoised hopes to reverse engineer a new spell this way.

Prisoners are subjected 24/7 to the constant chanting of a dark mantra. Once they have given in and joined the chanting, some are released and sent out into the world, where they inevitable spread the mantra, which will bring about the end. No warden or guards. Just the Chanters.

This elvish re-education camp is used to create and seed stereotypical forest-loving, bow using, human magic casting elves into the world. These elves are used to cast a more favorable light on elves in general, who are actually quite alien in their emotions, comportment and sexual tastes. Headmaster: Fraringas Awemawë of the Thistle Meadow

Hobbits use orcish prison labor to dig their holes. As this also involves the use of giant worm-like creatures, there’s a high casualty rate. Site Manager: Gobbo Stoutbarrel

Prisoners of the gnomes are forced to manufacture magic wands in terrible living conditions. Head Whip: Fawkes Khan

Illusionist training camp allows illusionists to hone their art on the helpless prisoners. Sometimes prisoners are convinced that they have been freed and are living at home. CEO: Moringen Pumblebrot, Burghogoblin of Tandoor

 

 

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A Few Guilt Trips for PC’s

Ronson writes:

Six or more tragic background stories to be revealed when the PC’s have just victimized a hitherto faceless, nameless NPC (inadvertently or otherwise), which will force the PC’s to act either heartbroken and repentant or cruel and callous. (Or maybe just emotionally dead)

Ok, so your PC’s have been dicks to someone. How are you going to make them feel like crap for it? I’ve posted some below, but I gotta say there’s a good chance your players will just fall over laughing…

Hob was bringing that herbal concoction to his sick daughter when you crowded past him and pushed him over the edge fo the cliff.

Bram was born blind, but his eyesight was restored to him just this morning. He was travelling back to his village to see his wife for the first time when you allowed that band of goblins to take him hostage and behead him.

Helgan’s virginity was pledged to the Count in exchange for the release of a brother from debtor’s prison. Now you’ve ruined that plan.

Marianne had caught the Vizier’s eye and had his trust. She had the poison from the assassin’s guild and knew how to administer just enough to kill him and avid suspicion. Now that you have killed her, her daughter will be a ward of the Caliphate, under the supervision of the Vizier…

That was Tig’s dog you ate. Tig is seven and was born the same day as that dog.

Half-glove was a lieutenant in the guard for thirty years. He was going to retire in six days.

Luthien was an elf. He was eight-hundred-years old. He had travelled the length and breadth of this continent, had seen the most beautiful sights, could recite poems not heard in centuries, cook recipes once reserved for kings with ingredients found in any peasant’s cupboard, play the harp to make a demon weep, knew treatments for the worst ailments known to man, the location of lost kingdoms, supported the orphans of anyone who he’d known to die in battle and, in short, knew the secrets to worldly contentment and equanimity, held the keys to peace and was a treasure to any who had met him. Until you killed him for his horse.

[Look, I don't really think any of these will work but if they do, be sure to tell me.]

Also: a note to orsobuffo: I have been working on your request. It’s taking a bit longer than I want but you are not forgotten. I am going to do a few more requests before posting yours in the interests of not losing steam. The results will be either spectacular or craptacular.

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